A bridge to the stars by Henning Mankell

Author:Henning Mankell [Henning Mankell]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Jeunesse
ISBN: 9780440240426
Published: 2009-08-11T07:00:00+00:00

7

When Joel wakes up next morning and goes to the kitchen, he sees that Samuel has not been at home all night. The stove is cold and there is no dirty coffee cup in the sink.

He is gripped by fear once again. It's a monster inside his stomach. An animal with vicious teeth and sharp claws, a beast eating its fill inside frightened people.

Joel decides to go out, lie down in the forest and die.

Samuel is not going to return.

He has gone away just like his mother did, and left Joel behind. He didn't even bother to take his son down to Mrs Westman's and leave him there.

He tries to convince himself that this isn't the case, and that he's only imagining it, but to believe that he'd have to ignore the cold stove and the coffee cup that isn't where it usually is.

He can't do that. There's a limit to how far he can go to fool himself.

He gets dressed and goes out into the street. It's colder again and steam comes out of his mouth when he breathes.

He can't go to school. That's out of the question. Everybody would be able to see by looking at him that Samuel had abandoned him and moved in with Sara, the waitress in the local bar. He makes up his mind to go so far into the forest that he won't be able to find his way back, and so can't have any second thoughts.

The forest is most extensive to the north, he knows that. There are also a lot of deep ravines and black tarns there. Lots of people have lost their way in that part of the forest and never returned. Now he'll become one of them. The difference being that he'll get lost on purpose.

He goes up the hill to the railway station, thinking that this is the last time. He turns round halfway up and surveys his own footprints. He remembers that his name is carved into the rock down by the river.

That will still be there when he's gone.

What has happened seems so unfair. How can you blame yourself when you can't choose your own parents?

And why would Sara want to choose Samuel? Or is it Samuel who's chosen her?

Perhaps he thinks I've been a bad mum to myself, Joel muses.

Maybe he thinks I've been just as bad as Jenny.

He stops when he comes to the road leading to Simon Windstorm's house.

Perhaps he can have a taste of Simon's soup before he goes to get lost in the forest? If it's true that it will enable him to see into the future, he'll be able to find out what happens after he's dead.

He walks through the dense fir trees, follows the lorry tracks and finds himself in the forecourt. Rusty machines, dismantled motor cars and power-looms are lying around everywhere, part-covered in snow.

It's like a cemetery, he thinks. Although the gravestones are rusty machines and don't have names carved on them.

He looks at the dilapidated house. There is no smoke coming out of the chimney, not a sound to be heard.

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